when you see the truth.!?!

when you are just sitting
in your own world of trouble and sadness, cause the only thing you want is, not to be here.
you don't see that the world around you is turing !
you don't want to talk to the others cause they are not like you
"they can't understand" you always say to yourself.
but they understand you !
but you refuse to believe it !

so the time goes round and round .
and when you're comming home everything has changed too and you also refuse to believe it...

for me the time has come to believe that:

all my old friends i never know.
and all the friends i have here , i don't like or i have scared them away.


so now i have noone as a real good friend
and i need this so much that i can't life write at the moment.
this is also the problem why i can't talk write ....



.the more you took away yourself.
.the more you are alone.
.the more you talk with your friends.
.the less you are at home.
;D

hate´that i love it.<3

too words.
ugly and silly.
thats me.!

i can't choose between.
-go working-
-or go on this school -

the biggest problem is that my marks change
because i don't want to lern so much in so many time
and i've got so much stress, that my brain explode .

but I want to attend this school it is great
but also horror.!

and i want to work but not now.

the best thing would be if school doesn't end at the evening
like it does now.

something MUST change .
If not i'm going to dead!




.trying to choose.
.try not to loose.
.all have to turn.
.than i can lern.
.lern about life.
.lern to survive.

maul halten .shut up.!

.give me your hand.
i'll go to town.
i want you to understand.
what i have found.
i found a piece of a heart.








.as long as you stand here
i'll be with you.

If u want to go.
I'll stand here to wait for you.
for ever.

my immortal.

this weekend.
no i won't start like that.

when you cryed
i'd wipe away all of your tears.


you can all this fuqqing shit blog .
emo blog because i'm only writing bad things and sad things in it,...


i kissed a boy and i had a problem with them
i don't know why but i cryed the hole saturday night at the
sturmfest .
and i met all kind of people i like but
i didn't care a just cryed
and now i'm in linz again and having trouble with me
and with everything.


.this is the time somehing will change.!